Friday, February 25, 2011

Redefining Words

Masturbation

I see masturbation as an activity that I enjoyed and I only cared about myself. I want more more and more of this feeling. I just want more and more. I obsessed into the feeling of masturbation and I without masturbation I would feel boring. Like I need the feeling either with someone around a companion or I would go masturbate. Just want to get that 'feeling' as long as possible. I want to live in that split moment of ecstasy forever. I disregard everything in my Life and just concentrate on one masturbation point and participate in the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate and subject under controlled of sex system and do not stand up within myself and take my control back.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I haven't treat the physical as one and equal to and as me but just enjoy the split moment of ecstasy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself just want to Live in ecstasy that ignoring my whole Life and not living within oneness equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to addicted and submit myself totally to ecstasy and do not live myself once I masturbate I do not stand up and too weak to walk myself out of the feeling of masturbation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to addicted into once I participate in the mind for masturbation I felt too good and ignore everything and just want more energy/feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to masturbate as an entertainment whenever I was boring or alone instead of doing things constructive.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that masturbation is only one form of living and the world is way more than just limiting myself in masturbation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in limitation being limited/less than sex system and masturbation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only live in the moment of ecstasy and limit myself into that moment only.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to determine to stand up and not being limited by masturbation after I masturbate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to submit myself to masturbation feeling and become it's slave and not living me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to obsessed and fear of losing the masturbation feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard the physicals that produce energy for masturbation.

Within seeing the pattern of I want more and more masturbation feelings I stop and breath and remind myself that I am not limited by sex system and masturbation feelings.

Within seeing the pattern of I do not want to stop and keep asking more on the masturbation feelings I stop and breath and remind myself I am not limited by sex feelings when I only keep on asking more and more I am a statement of I am limited by sex system.

Within seeing the pattern of I feel too good on the masturbation's feelings I stop and breath and remind myself that whenever I feel too good and too weak to stand up I am subject to less than and limited by sex masturbation system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take weakness as tender.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to say I am too weak in standing up not limited by my limitations like fears, pain sex and masturbation.


I am perfect I don't want to face myself accepting myself that I have even one flaw in me. It takes a lot of effort to accept that I have limited myself in a fake perfect self that it's only perfect in my own eyes and the truth is not so. I do not accept this using shifting changing topics and divert myself so I 'don't see the point'. The same thing keep happen on me again and again and I just keep asking why. It is embarrassing(which is not eager to change myself) and shame and I just avoid it not facing myself, when I see it today I am totally limited by my ego and I hide inside my own shell and not changing. Whenever someone point my shortfalls I don't want to listen and I shift topics. I got to the realization point that I cannot continue like that and I won't change and everything around me won't change and I am limited by all these shortfalls. I felt angry for being pointed out I am wrong I got defects inside me. Thinking maybe they are wrong they don't understand me but it is I am limiting myself into something that I obsessed into and not giving up and change myself not being limited.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to shift attention to manipulate myself and hoping others would forgot in what they see my shortfalls inside me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge how dare other people judge me and point out I have defects in me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to obsessed into a fake image of I am perfect and deceive myself in not facing my defects and change myself through seeing my defects for when I see it I would have to change myself slowly but surely.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself and others through changing topics but not explore and realize what I must change through self-forgiveness into someone that fit within oneness and equality and Life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel competence in my fake perfect image pretending I am perfect in every way and it's people's misunderstanding not realizing that I am deceiving and hurting myself in my future and compounding my consequences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel ashame when other people point out my flaws and urge me to look at it and I just ignore them and switch attention.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to steer away from my shame emotion and do not face my self my shortfalls through switching myself's attention.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge that it is others' misunderstanding me they don't understand me that make a false statement about me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think it is not worth my time and effort to even consider the points what others have comment about me and I judge that they are wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself only being limited by my ego and I just defend and live my ego and nothing else.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think my ego is perfect and holy yet I am not experiencing anything else but not eager to change my ego.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am perfect already and don't need any change of myself through self-forgiveness and corrective application.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize I keep switching topics means I deceive myself and steer away from my points means everything will just keep reappearing again in my future.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry and irritated when I am being pointed out for shortfalls and I don't like being pointed out I have shortfalls inside me.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to truly face when people pointing out my shortfalls and accept it could be inside me and embrace the point and self-forgive on the points.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself obsessed into my ego my fake perfect imagine image instead of giving up my ego and my points.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be limited only by my ego points.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to give up anything.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to let go and give up my points when they do not fit into oneness and equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be limited by not giving up and I haven't changed anything inside me outside me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself wanting to steer away my focus on guilt because it doesn't feel good on guilt about my shortfalls.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself do not want to face being ashamed of my guilt emotions and shifting topics instead of expand change self-forgive myself once and for all and not limited by my predefinitions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I can avoid emotions through steering away my focal point not realizing I cannot steer away from karma/consequences.

Within seeing the pattern want to shift attention I stop and breathe and remind myself I don't want to be limited by not changing myself.

Within seeing the pattern of getting irritated and angry I stop and breathe and remind myself I do not limited by angry and irritation and limited by not changing me.

Within seeing the pattern of want to steer away from guilt I stop and breathe and remind myself it is to stop the guilt through clearing the points and stop generating guilt in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself limited only by energy and not realize being limited is being enslaved no matter how good it feels or look like.


Limitation

Resentment

Fears


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